The Gayness of Having Gay

It's such bliss to have a GBF (that's Gay Best Friend to you). Actually, make that SGH (Surrogate Gay Husband). For those of us single girls who want to be seen hanging out with a man yet, don't want the added baggage of actually being with a man, a GBF is the best accessory to have. If you've graduated into the inner circles of Faghagdom (like yours truly) then you can up your ante and snag yourself a SGH.

Anyway, after going away on a spontaneous weekend with not one but two (in fact, it could've been THREE) lovely gay men, I shall count the ways in which a GBF totally rocks.

#1) They don't care if you break out in alcohol induced hives and don't bat an eyelid even when your neck is covered in red blotches.

#2) At the suggestion that your being alone in a hotel room with 2 men could lead to rape, one of them squeals 'But I Don't Know How To!!!'

#3) They will never develop an uncomfortable crush on you.

#4) They pretend to be your jealous boyfriend on Facebook so stalker losers will back off.

#5) You can talk real dirty with them and they wouldn't get turned on. In fact, they'll give you pointers on how to talk dirtier.

#6) They stave off prying questions from relatives who think that you two will eventually end up together.

#7) You can be as neurotic as you want when you're with them. Sometimes, they even indulge your neurotic fantasies and theories by fuelling them with some of their own.

#8) There's one thing they're straight about: fashion. (I stand by my conviction that it is a far greater compliment to be applauded by a gay man than a straight one).

#9) They're always game for a dance.

#10) They do all the skanking you're too afraid to do (they take the gay ones and pass the straight ones to you).