Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Mr. Maturity

Here's what NOT to do when you're trying to go after a guy who is super mature, sophisticated and out of your league.

1 - Call him Anal within the first 10 minutes of meeting him.
2 - When he goes silent at your remark, snort and go 'maybe not Anal, but stuck up'.
3 - If he crosses your path on the way to the toilet say to him loudly 'exsqueezzee me, but I need to peeee realllyyyy badllyyyyy'. (and make a joke of ur rhyming sentence)
4 - If he asks you what you did on the weekend say 'I lost my voice coz I was screaming at a BSB concert and tried to get backstage.'
5 - When he calls you 'Babe' giggle uncontrollably for the next 10 seconds.
6 - If he offers you a ciggy take the ciggy from him then start coughing uncontrollably when you try to smoke it. If you don't smoke, simply say 'I don't smoke.'
7 - Have your gay friend shout 'Hey HAMSAP PUKI PO!' from across the bar when you are sitting with him.
8 - If he doesn's acknowledge you or say Hi to you, shout at him from across the room and say 'OI MR.LANSI! WASSUP?'
9 - Tell him that you own Paris Hilton's album.
10 - Tell him he reminds you of your granduncle.

1 comment:

  1. oh man, these are so true. esp 4,5,6 and 9

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