Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Wrong Crush (Cont'd) - The Mute Button

When you stalk someone for close to 5 years... Ask anyone who has the remotest connection to him if they'd introduce you...Stalk his facebook...Plan what you would say to him should you ever meet him (because the last two times you have, you became a complete spastic)...and when you hope to see him but haven't in the last 2 years....

When he sits ONE row behind you in the cinema...and when he is standing one step in front of you at the stairs exiting the cinema...when he is but an arm's length away as you walk outside the cinema...when he gets into the lift behind you...when you're standing 2 inches away from his beautiful face in the lift...


Have a panic attack so big that your verbal diaorrhea mouth completely clams up. And you stand there quivering like a spastic (while your friend actually talks to him) with a stupid smirk on your face like you're holding a particularly smelly fart in.



Be like hey...what's up. I'm the girl who called you once. We spoke on the phone. You're a bit of an asshole but that's ok I like that. *flirty flirty* Btw, you're the only man in the country I'd date. I love your toned torso, you twatty fine man. *lick*

At least smiled at him as you exited the lift instead of running out of it with your hand on your head as if you're about to faint in a Malay kampung aunty style.


If you're going to regret it more if you DON'T do it. Then DO it.

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