Tuesday, June 16, 2009

New Depths of Low

I know THIS is supposed to be inspirational and I'm supposed to be like, YES YOU TOO CAN FIND A MAN! Just hang around the joke shop and wait for someone to save you from touching the joke Poo which that isn't really joke Poo but really a souvenir from the house cat. 

But THIS is exactly what happens when you aren't happy being single. You have to subject yourself to 1001 Ways To Meet Mr. Right. In other words, 1001 Ways To Stalk A Poor Unsuspecting Sod And Forcing Him To Give You His Number. 

I was actually approached to try out just some of these fabulous ways to meet men. However, since recent *events* that involved matchmaking (more on this later) I politely declined. But my poor FSG (Fellow Single Girl) wasn't so lucky. And so began a (I can only imagine) uncomfortable and long day of standing around flea markets, popcorn counters and car washes trying to give surreptitiously inviting looks to boys. 

Tsk tsk. I said it then and I say it now...if you had to put so much effort into meeting someone who will probably turn out to be an asshole, I rather be alone. Really. 


  1. I feel sorry for the girls, but the Bowler woman who wrote that ridiculous book to begin with must have a scre loose: accident sites? Jeeeezzzus. God I hope no one is desperate enough to think of bagging a guy when someone is liying in a pool of blood staring death in the face.

  2. HAHAHAHA....that article was, uhm, good advertisement for staying single???!! hooboy.

  3. could the visual instant gratification be any smaller? but great stuff here. u should buy a domain name and do a site-blog

  4. thanks all for dropping by! yay!
    and sorry the pic isn't bigger..i wanted to blow it up to the size of the whole page but my original pic was puny :(

    and yes, i was freaked out by the accident site thing too. WTH?

    dave: i no speaky techy language. what is all this domain name and site-blog please?